Sometimes I feel like it’s a taboo subject to say you’re missing work while on maternity leave. But I do miss it.
It’s not that I would rather be at work than with my son – not at all! It’s just a difficult transition to suddenly stop something that’s been a constant in my life for the last 10 years – getting up and going to work.
I know I’m 100% looking at it with rose tinted glasses though. I know I’m forgetting the Sunday night blues and the early alarm calls, the stressful meetings, long hours and irritating colleagues.
But when you’re lucky enough to enjoy the work you do, and in a lot of ways define yourself through that work, when it’s taken away it’s a bit of a shock to the system.
I miss the people. The feelings of camaraderie when disaster strikes. The sense of pride when a project goes well. The feelings of accomplishment and job satisfaction.
Now, I absolutely do not want to go back to work tomorrow. I’m perfectly happy knowing I’m going to wake up next to my boy, play with him, take him for a walk, and watch an episode of Game of Thrones while he naps (I’m trying to catch up before season 7 starts). But the thought of never going back to work? That would be hard.
What helps is changing my mindset and recognising the same feeling of accomplishment in raising a child that I did with work. Because every day there’s something new and magical that he does as he grows and learns – I just think I need to start taking more credit for it!
I need to remember that I’m not just a mother, or a marketer, or a wife or a daughter, or a geek with terrible taste in music – I’m all of these things put together.
And just because I’m not at work tomorrow doesn’t mean I’m not a marketer.
When I go back to work after maternity leave, it won’t make me any less of a mother.
And that’s OK.